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Tuesday, November 15, 2011

The Un-list (Part 1)

Luci Swindoll talked at Women of Faith about times when she had done something unexpected or surprising and was asked why.  Her response? "Nobody told me I couldn't."  At first this got me thinking about my list of things undone or unfinished.  There is a list of such things much longer than I want to admit to myself.  I am calling it my un-list.  I wondered why I wasn't doing the things on that list.  Is anybody telling me I can't?  Well, no, not really.  Except ONE person- ME!  I realized that truly I am the only one keeping me from doing the things I have not done.  For some things, it's negative self-talk and fear of rejection. For other things, it's allowing my life circumstances as a busy wife, homemaker and homeschooling mom to be an excuse for not doing them (and, thus, avoiding said rejection!).

I realized that my fear of rejection is only because I am allowing my worth to be defined by what others think.  I do (should) not aim to please others.  I (should) aim to please God.  And even the very hairs of your head are numbered.  So do not be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows. Matthew 10:30-31

Yesterday, I broke free of that fear.  I had found a recipe contest through Pacific Natural Foods about a month ago.  I made up my very own recipe.  I cooked it a couple times.  We thought it was great.  My girls encouraged me to enter it.  My husband encouraged me to enter.  But, still, I didn't enter.  Until yesterday!  It was the very last day to enter and to vote.  First thing in the morning, I filled out that form.  I hesitated a bit, but I hit the submit button and shared it on Facebook.  When it was done, I felt the guilt lift.  I had been silently torturing myself wondering if I should enter and feeling guilty for not entering for a month.  It was done!  (The results will be posted today, so I will let you know!)

My sister called me a few hours later and told me she had voted for my recipe, but that it didn't seem like something she would like.  I thanked her for supporting me with her vote and just kind of chuckled that she didn't care for it.  That's ok.  I don't need her to like it (I need the judge to like it! LOL).  Sure, it'd be great to win, but that's not why I entered.  I entered for exactly what she helped me with in her comment- baby steps toward kicking my fear of rejection to the curb.  I told that liar Satan who kept me telling myself that I am not good enough- NOT TODAY, bozo!  NOT TODAY!  I will not be ruled by fear today!

Today, I want to challenge you to do something that's on your un-list.  First you may have to acknowledge what's on it.  I encourage you to take that step.  Then, pick something that you can either do in it's entirety or partly and DO IT!  You will be glad you do!  I pray that we may all learn to live free of the guilt of unfinished business, free of the fear of rejection, and free to live for Him.